How will you be remembered?

Today I woke up to find out a wonderful person on the Theologyweb forums passed away due to a heart attack.

Although I was never, sadly, close to him nor did I meet him, I saw his posts and what little interaction we had was on good terms. He was know as The Curtmudgeon but we’ll call him Curt. He always had a great sense of humor and put others before himself. Today, we remember him in our own way. Some have met him, others didn’t. Some knew him well, others didn’t.

I remember being told that he was taking distance courses from Liberty U like I am. I never got around to asking him about it, and now I won’t be able to until I see him on the other side.

As always, we will no doubt shut down Tweb for one day in honor of Curt and have special night of remembrance in Paltalk. A time to play music, remember old times and most of all, remember our friend who is gone to a place we can’t wait to go ourselves.

In the past 2 years I’ve dealt with death in many different ways. I lost my cat in January 2006. That was my first true experience with death of a close friend. Then another member of Tweb passed away and that hit hard too. It’s strange isn’t it? One day you’re there, the next you’re not. You wake up knowing you won’t see them online again and sometimes you tell yourself that you still will.

There are many that believe, as I do, that one day I will see my lost loved ones again if they were saved by grace through Jesus Christ. There are those that want nothing to do with that. If you don’t, Theologyweb is an excellent place to learn more.

Back to the topic: death and remembering. At a funeral/wake you have people give eulogies about the ones who have gone and remembering funny, serious or wonderful things the person did or said.

When one of the other members of  Tweb, Bandecoot, died I remember someone had two small 1 minute clips of his voice and uploaded them for us to download and keep as a bit of a remembrance of him. I thought of myself. For those who don’t know, I wrote many parodies for Tweb and read many on the microphone on Paltalk. Thus far, there’s 14-15 hours of audio of me reading that can be downloaded along with several stories I have written.

I thought back on how I would be remembered when I go. If I were to go today, people would be sad and they would no doubt listen or play those files. I am thankful that I have those so in the event that I go and Tweb is still here, people can look at those and in a way, I won’t be gone.

I hope I’m also remembered for being a good friend, a good listener and hopefully by the time I go, a loving husband and father. More than that, I hope I have thus far done at least an adequate job of representing Christ. I’m not perfect. I fall sometimes, but I pick myself back up and keep on going. My friends know some of those struggles and experiences.

So, today as we remember a friend, ask yourself: if you were to die today, how would you be remembered?

Goodbye Curt. See you on those white shores on that far green country under a swift sunrise.

Brandalf (Tweb will not be the same without you) 85

 

New England Trip: Day 1 – New York

I promised a report on my trip, so I guess we’ll start here and I’ll try to go day by day, unless nothing much happened.

So, I woke up at around 6am (EST) and got ready to go. I had trouble sleeping the night before, but I wasn’t really that tired. So, my friend arrived. His name is Tyler and he’s been a good friend for quite some time. We met years ago at my church and he is the eldest of 5 kids.

Anyway, I said goodbye to my parents, got into the car and off we went.

First things first: we stopped for gas. And so continued our journey up the highway through New Jersey. I used to live in Somerset, NJ so we passed quite close to it at one point. It’s a long journey to get to New York from where I live, about 7-8 hours. I think it was around 3 when we finally got there.

We took the Lincoln Tunnel into Manhattan and there I was in New York City for the first time. You could tell it was indeed the city by the fact that just moments after a green light went off, all the car horns honked. It was pretty cool being there where in places I had seen in the movies.

I saw the Empire State Building as we came in and the Chrysler Building was on my left as we drove in. The same building I had seen Godzilla help get destroyed in the American Godzilla. The same one I had seen in many other movies as well. That was pretty cool.

We drove a bit longer. We were heading to 59th and Lexington and soon found a parking garage. After that ,we had about an hour till we were set to meet one of Tylers friends. So he asked if I’d like to go to Central Park or look at some more buildings. I opted for Central Park. I wanted to actually go to SOME site on my trip there. So, we walked to the park.

I had seen this in many movies as well. More recently the movie Cloverfield where the ending took place. We were in the Eastern side and it seemed so peaceful compared to the rest of the city. Someone had a great idea in having Central Park, that’s for sure. We saw the horses carrying people by carriage to and fro, and an old sheeps field where it is now a place for people to just throw frisbees or just sit and enjoy themselves.

After that, we had headed back to meet his friend name Chris who works for Bloomberg and it was right near Bloomingdales, another site from the Cloverfield movie.

Tyler called him up and told him we were there and he soon came down. We met and decided to head to Long Island, where Chris lived, for dinner. After getting our car back, we began the long drive to the aptly named Long Island. That took over an hour and we ended up going to an Italian place nearby Chris’s house.

It was a very good place, though I forget the name, sadly. It had excellent service and food, plus live music provided by at least two men playing guitars and taking requests. It was a top notch place and there was still food on our plates when our bellies were filled to the corners.

After that, we headed to Chris’s house and sort of just relaxed there for awhile. I called my parents to let them know I was ok and to give an update and after that, Chris, Tyler and I hung out downstairs and talked.

Chris is married and has two very young children, but they were out of town that day and so we soon went to sleep.

So ends day 1.

 

It’s been a long time…

There hasn’t been too much new going on in my life of late to really blog about. Things are sort of the same as they were before, with things going slowly, but surely.

This week I am heading up with a friend to the New England area of the USA which is the North East for those who don’t know.

We’ll be traveling through New York, Rhode Island, Connecticut, Maine, Vermont and Massachusets. It’ll be a 9 day journey. Our main purpose is for a friends wedding in CT on the 3rd of October.

Sigh, everyone is getting married. Getting a bit tired of it really, maybe more than a bit as some of my friends could tell you…but, I will try to smile for my friend. It’s his day and something I would not dare want to ruin out of my selfish sadness which is constantly before me.

We’ll be back on the 9th and I’ll probably end up falling asleep…ah to be in my own bed will be nice.

On Oct 27th, the demo for Left 4 Dead 2, a sequel to my most played game, is coming out and I’m very much ready to play it! Nov 17th is the full game release date.

Oct shall be an interesting and fun month and I am looking forward to most of it…

Hopefully I’ll have a full rundown of my New England tour when I get back.

 

Farewell 2008

Some people may write long or multiple thoughts on 2008 and what it meant to them.

While I could do that easily, I am going to simply quote someone. This quote applies to me in 2008 personally, not nationally or globally or anything else.

“It was the best of times, it was the worst of times.”  – Charles Dickens – A Tale of Two Cities.

 

Rant: Height and Dating

Ok, I just need to vent for a moment, so if I sound upset that’s probably because I am!!!

I have been looking around these dating sites, mainly cause I’m bored, and I’ve noticed a pattern: girls prefer tall guys. These are Christian girls! I googled height and dating. All over the same pattern repeated itself: girls prefer taller guys for no reason.

Some of them have reasons: Protection. That’s fine and all. But cmon…the majority of the time there is no real reason. They just see that as how things should be.

I see all the personality preferences, things they look for in a guy. I fit them. Then I look further and see this: “5′8” or taller”. Geez. Nice to know that if I’m not tall enough, I’m not good enough for them. Is this a freakin theme park? “Must be this tall to date this girl”.

It really bothers me that girls seem to be this shallow. It’s not real different than anyone saying, “Well, you don’t have blonde hair, even though you’re the perfect girl for me, so therefore you are not worth dating.” Well, awesome! I’m so glad that physical things are more important than what really matters!

I’m sure you’re now wondering why I would be so upset. Well, I’m short. How short? 4′11. Yes, you read it right.

So, I realize that it’s going to suck for me to try to find a girlfriend for the most part. I KNOW there are girls out there that do NOT care about the height of the guy, but who he is as a person.

This is sort of “The Nice Guy: Part Two”.

As I said, I seem to be the ideal guy for what girls say they look for. But then they go right around and put the whole “Must be” so and so height. It makes me wonder if girls are really looking for those things, or is height more important. It’s quite stupid and irritating.

It’s not exactly like I can control how tall I am. I mean, there’s nothing I can do about it. I’m going to be this height for the rest of my life. So, if a girl can’t get past that, then I guess I’ll just have to deal with the fact that, Christian girls or not, they’re pretty shallow.

To those girls out there that do not care about how tall a guy is: Thank you. Thank you for giving guys like me that small amount of hope. It is indeed a small amount of hope (and no that’s not a short joke!). Everywhere I look it’s “Guy must be taller than girl” etc etc. Why? Cause the world always says it must be so? Good job standing up for your own beliefs there, ladies.

One thing I do take comfort in is this: Whoever does end up dating me, I will know at least they’re not doing it because of how I look, but how I act. I guess I should be thankful for that, but it’s hard to be when no one seems to be that person.

As I said, I know there are girls out there that are wonderful and do want a nice Christian guy who will love them, make them laugh and could care less about height or looks. I just wish they were more plentiful.

I’m getting to the point of just being tired of being alone. Seeing all my friends getting married or in a wonderful relationship just reminds me of it. I hold out every hope that sooner rather than later I will find someone. Will it last? I hope so. But, there’s only one way to find out.

It wouldn’t bother me so much, perhaps, if I could do something about how tall I am. As I said, I can’t. It seems girls would rather settle for a tall guy with no personality rather than a short guy with the very personality they seek. How sad. Sad for guys like me, and sad for society.

Girls and guys need to change how they see things.

As a Christian, I know that God looks at the inward and not the outward when it comes to how one must be truly seen. I ask you, if the God of the universe, that made you, the stars, planets, galaxies…everything, can do this…is it ok to let ourselves settle for a LESSER standard than He? I think not.

In this world, we live and see that many will just look on the outward and many will regret it. I hope that girls and guys will begin to at least start CONSIDERING those around you that may not be tall enough, thin enough, “hot” enough, and begin to consider whether they are good enough for what you really need in life.

Thank you for listening. Whether anyone really hears this, time will tell. Goodbye for now…

 

IRL

Another one I wrote on Theologyweb. I may add a bit to it though…

Todays blog is a serious entry about a thing that I thought would be good to be touched on. Here we go!

I think everyone has used or heard of the term “In Real Life” or “IRL”, sometime. It’s part of the online thing. You go “Well, IRL I don’t” or “I don’t know that person IRL”. But using this expression seemed to take a very odd twist when Bandecoot passed away last year (2006).

What DOES “IRL” mean anyway? I never met Bande, or thought I would. Does that make him not part of REAL life? He WAS a real person! His death certantly was real. The sorrow and sadness over all of Tweb, and among his friends, was real. Did I imagine that Tweb shut down for 24 hours, just to honor his memory? No! That was real life.

I remember sitting down and watching “The Return of the King” as a sort of mental therapy. For me, The LOTR trilogy has been a sort of retreat for me. I love the characters, the Christian background and so many other things. In this case, the last scene in the trilogy, which I won’t spoil for those who haven’t seen it, is most filled with emotion.

The music, the acting, and just genuine humanity of the entire story, and this scene most of all, certantly tugs at the heartstrings. The week after Bande’s death, I cried after watching that, and him being unsaved was what hurt me most of all. I won’t ever see him now in this life or the other. Though both be real.

I have met so many friends online, but they are all ‘real’ as in they exist. So, saying “in real life” is not a very good way of putting things when it comes right down to it. I may not have met anyone but they exist, they cry, they have lives. Yes, they live. I live. We all live and we live in LIFE! REAL LIFE!

Now, we may ACT slightly, or greatly, different than we do offline, but that may be due to the setting. I, for one, am not as nearly outgoing as you see me online! I am actually very shy. However, my humor and other things are there, though it may take awhile to crack that egg.

I think a better way of putting “IRL” could be “IP. I know that is already an internet term, but it could mean “In Person”.

I have met a few Twebbers. They’re wonderful people. I even had a romantic relationship with one. Those things, these people, are very real. They have real issues. They impact real people on a daily basis. Many of them I consider my best friends. I can now say I know a few in person (IP).

I shall end with this part of a poem from the Lord of the Rings that I have always loved. I can’t express WHY I get ‘giddy’ over it. Something REAL about it. Just this one line, it feels so REAL. I don’t know why. Here it is:

“And all the while I sit
And think of things that were before
I listen for the sound of returning feet
And voices at the door.”

 

The Ents and The Church

I wrote this blog on Theologyweb around 2 years ago. However, I thought I’d share it here:

In the Lord of the Rings, the book and movies, the Ents are marching toward Isengard, the fortress of the wizard, Saruman. They don’t look happy but why would they do this?

Perhaps a bit of background on the Ents would be good.

The Ents or Onodrim, are Tree-like Shepherds of the Forest. There are the Ents, who are NOT trees and the Huorns, who are tree-like ents or just trees. Not all trees can move, but Huorns are like sheep and thus the need for Ents. They are EXTREMELY slow at talking or wanting to do anything. The oldest Ent is named Fangorn or Treebeard.

Saruman is a wizard who has gone bad and from his tower of Isengard, he has made designs of his own evil and he is cutting down trees on the forests of Fangorn, the forest where the Ents live.

The Ents, largely unaware (and completely in the movie) of Saruman’s deeds, are met with a strange happening. Two hobbits, Merry and Pippin, arrive in the forest and awaken Treebeard. They tell him about what’s happening and Treebeard gathers various representives of the Ents kinds (Oak, Chestnut, Ash etc etc) to an Entmoot, which is a gathering of Ents to discuss Saruman.

In the books, the Ents take a couple of days but finally decide to march on Isengard. “It is likely we go to our doom, but if we stay here and do nothing doom would find us sooner or later. That is why we are marching NOW,” said Treebeard, with the hobbits on his shoulders. Meanwhile, The Huorns head to Helms Deep and some remain closeby. They shout with an anger and cry out against Isengard.

“To Isengard to Isengard with roll of drum we come we come. To isengard with doom we come with doom we come!” They all shout.

In the films, The Ents decide not to do anything, claiming they must weather the storm as always they have done. Merry shouts “BUT YOU’RE PART OF THIS WORLD! Aren’t you? You must help, please! You must do something…” Pippin comes up with a foolish plan: to take Treebeard by the edges of the forest, nearest to Isengard. Treebeard agrees and sees the devastation first hand. It’s only then that Treebeard becomes angry.

“There is no curse in Elvish, Entish or the Tongues of men, for this treachery. My business is with Isengard tonight, with rock and stone,” says Treebeard, as all the Ents march out of the woods and to the tower.

Now, I am reminded of how the modern Church is much like the Ents. We are slow to act, we do alot of talkign but not alot of action and we usually don’t do anything unless it affects us directly. How would it be if the church had an ‘entmoot’ and gathered the leaders of all the denominations and discussed something like abortion?

Abortion is one reason, after talking to Nick, that I wrote this. I told him about a story where this girl stabbed her newborn, litterally JUST born, baby more than 100 times and she’s convicted of first degree murder. If a doctor had crushed the skull of the same child one minute earlier, it would be ok and just be abortion. A womans right to choose? This woman chose to stab her child, but I guess that’s awful but killing them just as they come out is just fine.

I gave an example to Nick about a cook and a pizza. The cook receives a wonderful order for a wonderfully unique pizza. This pizza is unique, as is all his pizzas. Yet every one is wonderful. The pizza is put into the oven and it cooks. It dings! TIme to come out! Yummm. As the pizza is coming out of the oven, the women who took part in the ordering of the pizza runs over, grabs the pizza and steps on it and crushes it beyond reason (or perhaps she has someone else do it for her). The cook looks on in disbelief and says, “Why did you do that? What was wrong with the pizza?” “Nothing I guess,” says the woman, “I just didn’t want it.”

Now imagine how you would feel if you had just made a wonderful pizza or piece of art or something. How would you feel if someone, who had no right in the situation, to come and smash it down. Not very happy I guess. Now imagine God is the cook or the painter or whatever you would like to apply to it.

Yes, the church is like the Ents, slow to anger but when roused, we can be a formidable force.

“The coming of Merry and Pippin is like the falling of small stones that starts an avalanche in the mountains. A thing is about to happen that has not happened since the Elder Days: The Ents are going to wake up and find that they are strong,” says Gandalf.

This world needs more churches and people in them to be Merry and Pippins. Rouse the Ents! Get an Entmoot! Get a righteous anger going. I’m not saying throw down the literal towers or smash “orcs” into pieces. But you can march, and you can shout with a loud voice.

Treebeard cared for the fallen trees that he once knew. “Many of these trees were my friends. Creatures I had known from nut and acorn. They had voices of their own!” Children have voices but they never got the chance to grow from their “acorns” and have any chance of being friends. Treebeard then cries out with a loud voice of sadness and anger all at once. Perhaps if more of us did that.

Sure, theres “March for Life” and things like that. But does marching alone do anything? No, not really. Voting, talking about it more than once a year or during Election season would do much more.

People cry out against 3,000 deaths in the War in Iraq of our troops. I once heard that 4,000 children are aborted every day. 4,000…a DAY! But do we hear one outcry for it? I haven’t. We have a day in January celebrating life. Then we seem to forget it till the next year. The church needs a “small stone” so the avalanche will start.

Gandalf said the Ents would “wake up and find they are strong.” The church fails to realize how powerful it can be if it just would wake up and look around. Imagine if all the churches came together on this one issue, constantly sent messages to their elected officials, and didn’t let up. Imagine if we did like the Ents did, and every church had a marching to Isengard. What would that mean? A march for life is a good idea, but imagine if all the churches did it and not just a few people. We’re the army of the Lord for a reason. Most of us act like the waterboys and don’t bother with weapons but staying quiet and asking if anyone needs anything.

Of course doing things for groups and people is great. We forget sometimes that babies are people but we don’t seem to do much for them. There must be a way but Fangorn is sleeping and the Ents are at rest. Who will rouse them and begin the Entmoot? Who? It could be you. It could be anyone. I hope someone does. It may take more than one person. It only took two tiny hobbits to do it.

Hope this wasn’t too much ranting. I’m tired now. Goodnight and Hroom Hoom Toom!

 

Note: I am NOT calling for violent demonstrations. Standing up for what you believe in just means not backing down when the time comes, regardless of what may happen to you. It also means being active and not just sitting by while evil happens.

 

Optimism and Pessimism

“A pessimist is what an optimist calls a realist.” – Ashley Williams – Mass Effect (video game)

That’s one way of looking at it I suppose. I am a natural optimist in almost every aspect. Although, I have become more of a pessimist in terms of my love life. I am still very optimistic about it, but then I look at the past and see it’s not very optimistic and so I set myself up for failing. It sounds like a defeatist mentality and I guess it is and that’s why I try to avoid it.

I know a few pessimists. My dad being one of them. It seems a rather gloomy and sad way to look at things. I can understand being pessimistic about a thing or two, but everything? I do not think that is a healthy lifestyle overall.

I do agree some people are TOO optimistic about things. Pollyanna’s of the world. Everything is rosey no matter how much it sucks. As a Christian, I am to rejoice even in the bad things. I look to the book of Job as one of the chief examples of such things. He lost everything save his life, his wife and his so called friends. But no matter what happened, he never cursed God or doubted him. In fact he said, “The Lord giveth and the Lord taketh away. Blessed be the name of the Lord.” That’s faith right there.

It’s not easy to say things like that. God doesn’t expect us to just be cheery about all things. There are times we’re going to blame God for the things in the world. Sometimes though, we turn to absolute pessimism about the world.

I had one tell me that “If you’re a pessimist, if the good thing happens you’re surprised. If you’re an optimist and it doesn’t happen, you’re in the dumps.” I can see his POV to some extent. A realist seems to be the balance or something like that.

A realist won’t always be gloomy about the outcome, but he will think of the chances of anything good happening. There ARE times when people just need to realize you’re in a Catch 22: If you do one thing, it’s gonna be bad, if you do another, it’s gonna be bad too! It doesn’t happen often, but sometimes you’ll have to choose the lesser of two evils as it were.

As humans, we don’t know what’s going to happen. It sucks. I sure have a few things I’d like to know about right now! Like who am I going to marry? Do I know her yet?

In my love life, I often ask God when I am going to finally get a lasting relationship. So far, my longest has been 3 months. Yeah, not long really. The last one I did everything I was supposed to do and it still didn’t work out. It sometimes feels like I’m a guinea pig running through mazes, being experimented on and so forth. Or perhaps a better animal would be the hamster: On a wheel going nowhere fast. I try not to think like that, but it does occur in my mind that it feels like that.

I have chosen, overall, to be optimistic about the whole thing. God has a plan for me. He says he does. Plans not to harm me, but to help me. He allows things to happen, for various reasons. I know why my last one ended. It wasn’t really about me. I’ve come to terms with that. It doesn’t mean I am all happy about it though. Not a day goes by where I don’t think of her and pray for her. But I also wish that it didn’t end the way it did, nay, that it never had to end to begin with.

I have alot of good reasons to be pessimistic about my future in that area. I could go on for hours about it. I know one or two of you out there that I’ve spoken to have been “subjected” to my stories, by choice. It’s not very fun to listen to, and it wasn’t fun to experience. But I CHOOSE to say that when the time is right, that girl will run across my path, and doubtless I won’t know it at the time, but she’ll be the one for me in the end, as it were. Maybe I’ve met her already. Maybe I will meet her tomorrow? Who knows. I don’t, but God does.

In the end, it’s all in His hands. As Humans, we don’t like thinking about such things. Someone else has my future in their hands and he doesn’t tell me anything about it except trust him. It’s not always easy, but I promise, it’s always worth it. This reminds me of a scene from my favorite TV show, LOST.

In this scene, two of the main character, Jack and John, are having a discussion about faith:

“Why do you find it so hard to believe, Jack?” – John                                                                               

“Why do you find it so EASY?!?!” – Jack

“It’s never BEEN easy!!” – John

I think that about sums that up on faith. So, I am optimistic about my future most of the time. Why? Because I have Faith in the one who holds it. I don’t know what’s around the next corner, but I know who is in charge of who will come around it. I try to look at it as an adventure. I think my favorite author, J.R.R. Tolkien summed it up in one of his poems:

“Around the corner there may wait a new road or a secret gate. And though I will pass them by today, tomorrow I may come this way and take the hidden paths that run West of the Moon and East of the Sun.”

I don’t know if this has a been a helpful blog overall. I hope it was. I sort of jumped a bit from the topic, to Faith and back again. But I guess my faith goes hand in hand with why I am optimistic. As I said, I am pessimistic too and I went into that.

I can’t think of anything more to add to this right now. Maybe I will blog on this again some other time. For now, I hope you people try to be optimistic. Don’t be Pollyanna’s though, but don’t be always expecting the worst either. It’s a fine line, but you can do it.

 

Key Components of a Relationship

I have blogged before about a couple of these but I thought I would expand upon some of them.

These are in no particular order, but they are all pretty important.

Trust – Trust might just be the number one component. If you can’t trust that person or they can’t trust you, you will live everyday wondering if that other person is faithful to you or not. Everything will be a lie until proven otherwise. That’s not healthy for any relationship and a romantic one most of all. When I was with “L”, I confided alot in her. As I’ve said before, as of this writing, she knows me better than anyone else in the entire world. Why? Because I trusted her with some information about myself that I didn’t in anyone else.

Trust isn’t always about lying or not though. She trusted me not to judge her for things she had done, as I trusted her for that. She trusted that I would stay faithful to her no matter what, and I did. Those types of trust are very important in this kind of relationship. I can’t imagine wondering everyday if she was cheating on me or lying to me or what. That’s why cheating on someone you love often costs the relationship. I know of someone like that. The guy wonders if he can trust her ever again. I can’t blame him. He’ll always wonder now and that can eat you up inside.

In the end, there were sure some major trust issues with me and “L” that I won’t get into out of respect for her and for privacy reasons. I wish it were not like that. I’ll be more careful in the future, but still, you can’t always tell about people. I loved her with all of my heart, and that was a first for me. Perhaps I trusted too quickly or too much. Anyway, the point of this is, trust is important.

Openness – I found in my relationship to “L” that being open was very important. What do I mean by openness? Well, the ability for her to come to me with problems or questions without fear of being judged, rejected or laughed at. The same was for me and her. If I had a problem or a question about us, I could go to her and just talk to her about it. I’d like for my next relationship to me like that too. It was very rewarding to know I could talk to her about anything.

Now, of course, there are things that maybe the other person does NOT want to hear, so be sure you go over that before start telling a long story. Some girls don’t mind hearing about your past relationships. Before we broke up, L and I were going to talk about both of ours and how they shaped us into the people we are today. I sadly never got the chance. And I can understand why some girls would NOT want to hear about it. The past is the past, don’t talk about it right? Well, the past HAS shaped me into the person I am today so I think forgetting the past or shoving it aside is not a good idea. That doesn’t mean that I have to tell everyone, but it is nice to talk to people about it.

Openness and Trust go hand in hand. Obviously, you’re not going to be telling someone you don’t trust all about your past and confide in them about it. It’s something I would talk to the next girl I’m involved with about, well the openness part, before I get to talking. I’d let her know she can come to me anytime and talk about whatever she wants to. I hope she would be willing to do the same, but I would respect her if she didn’t want to discuss certain things. That’s ok. But still, sometimes you have to talk to SOMEONE about it and who better than the person you very well might be with for the rest of your life?

Caring/Love – I’ve blogged about love and romance before, so I won’t go overboard on this. But there are some people who just can’t express love or that they care in the best way. When a girl says they love the guy, the guy might go “uhh yeah, me too. So, wanna watch a movie?” Now, the guy might really love her but right then he’s just not comfortable with his feelings. For me, it’s quite easy and I enjoyed telling L that I loved her and that I cared for her everyday. I guess that’s what happens when you are a romantic at heart. You enjoy being able to tell that person how much they mean to you.

I guess it’s just something guys and girls alike need to work at sometimes. That’s also a problem with some relationships. The girl or guy would like a certain type of romance but he/she is not getting it from the other person, alot of times because the other person just doesn’t know HOW to express it correctly. This can come from lack of experience, being shy/nervous, not really a feeling person etc.

This, however, ties into openness. If you have a problem with your boy or girlfriend involving love (and frankly anything) go and talk to them about it. Guys, like anyone, can’t read minds and sometimes don’t want to tell the girl about how nervous they are etc. We like figuring it out. Problem is, that often leads to girls just dumping the guy without even speaking to him about the issue. Sit him down, tell him that you love him but that you would appreciate if he can be more open about his feelings and love. Suggest things for him to do. That’s another thing, sometimes people just don’t know what is romantic to the other person and we don’t want to screw up. It’s alot better than breaking up over an issue that could be resolved by talking.

Which brings us to a related component of Openness: Communication.

Talk to the person you love. Seriously. Call them on the phone, send them an IM, talk over the mic on an IM program or better yet, in person. That’s why first dates are good because you establish whether you and the other person can communicate. If you can’t really think of anything to talk about it, it COULD just be nervousness on both parties but it could be that you just don’t have alot in common, and the conversation drags on to nowhere.

I found with L, that talking to her was very rewarding and wonderful. We got on AIM and the the microphones and would talk for hours and hours on end. I loved just hearing her voice, no matter what she was talking about. It was the most beautiful sound at the time. We just “clicked”. We could talk for hours about nothing and still have the most fun we had all day. I find those are the types of relationships that have great potential. If you can talk about nothing and have fun, imagine the stuff you aren’t even talking about yet.

If you don’t talk to them, they’re just going to think you don’t care. So, call them up from time to time and let them know you’re thinking of them. Do what you have to but don’t go not talking to them if you can help it. There are so many ways to talk these days, there’s almost no excuse.

I think that’s all for now. I can’t think of anything else to add but if I do, expect another blog on this sort of thing. See you in the next blog.

 

Christian Halo Group Part 2

I noticed alot of people are searching for a Halo group and my older post doesn’t have alot of info on it and it’s older and the group wasn’t even mentioned.

The group I am with is simply called “Christian Halo”. You can find us on bungie.net at this address http://www.bungie.net/fanclub/777ch777/forums/topics.aspx?forumID=131535

You have to have an account with all that microsoft stuff but hey it’s a good group.

My Xbox Live gamertag is MightyGrunt85. I probably will accept your friend request but I request you only do it if you’re going to not swear up a storm and be vulgar etc.

Christian Halo has game nights where we play custom games etc. It’s fun and a good chance to get to know new people. So, join up if you want.

I know this is a departure from my normal blogs, but since a few people were searching for this, I thought I’d provide what info I could. Hope this helped.